When Patulousness Becomes Petulant

My pathos plant is not sprouting new leaves but is instead growing longer and longer and longer and longer. If it gets any longer I'm going to have to wrap it up in a turban and man would that be silly! I want new leaves so it looks a little more respectable in its orange swan planter, which is the cool word for pot. I mean for fuck, I am the partner of a gardener. I don't want to bring horticultural shame onto our house!

Did I mention I am a self described world bonsai champion?